Most of us wld have little voices in our heads all the time - telling us we are not good enough for this or that, not only in training but in our every day life.Today, those little voices in mine were LOUD!!! I was excited on Friday nite with the thot of the LD Brick the next morning. Planned to go slightly longer than LD Bricks I logged 3 weeks ago (which was a 100k+10k) & to see where I stand after 7 weeks of training.
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Over slept and started late at 8.a.m. from Precinct 1. Split
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Transition took up 15 minutes (pee, pack bike in car & change into running shoes & vest). It was almost 1.00 p.m. then and it was burning hot. Told myself that I've done 12 laps here b4, so what's 4 laps.
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But the little voices started talking back "BUT THAT WAS WITHOUT CYCLING 134KM". I ignored it & pushed off anyway. When I got out to the run course, I found the traffic that afternoon was exceptionally heavy (due to some sale carnival at Alamanda). Hesitated for a while and thot of changing the running route towards PICC instead. But decided to stick to original plan b'cos I wld hv problems with water bottles if I do a out-and-back run to PICC (I had 3 small mineral water bottles with me which I placed under some plants by the road side).
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The clouds came in shortly after I started my first lap. The air felt cool and I ran comfortably and was surprised with a 20:55 split. Thot that wld be my lucky day with the weather but 1/2 thru 2nd loop, the clouds parted and the sun toasted me thru out the rest of the run. Felt hungry at start of 2nd lap and wallopped my last packet of PowerGel. Regreted not bringing more PowerGel, I started to feel hungry & a little weak again in the 3rd loop. My legs also started to feel heavier by then. The sun did not help either. Saw dark clouds in the horizon and perhaps rain near PICC. But that was some 15km away from where I was. I looked up at the sun overhead and saw clear blue skies. I remember saying something like "Give Me A Break!!!"
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Then the little voices came back LOUDER "BUT YOU RAN THE DAMN 12 LAPS EARLY IN THE MORNING!!!". By then, I hv abandoned my splits and only hoped to finish the run no matter how slow. I reminded myself that I am targeting a 5:00:00 marathon at IM and I could afford a 25min lap here.
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Suddenly, it started to feel like Desaru again...dehydrated and weak. But I was not in a race and I need not push. So I tried very hard to maintain my pace and told myself to just finish the damn run. The last lap felt like never ending. It felt so good to see the PM office again towards the end of the run. I almost wanted to hug it, if I could.
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Then, the voice came back "HEY, YOU ARE NOT THERE YET!!" It was right, I had almost 1km to go. But the thot did not dampen my spirit and somehow I felt a sense of victory as I ran down the final km towards the end of yet another tough session. And yes, there was also another thot in my mind as I approached the end. "My Cold Powerbar Recovery Drink" that was waiting for me in the car.
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I finished the run in 1:31:41 and my lap times were 20:55, 23:19/ 23:25 / 24:10.
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All in (including water break & transition), I was out there for 6:50:00. No where near the duration of my target IM finishing time but by far my longest workout this season todate. Felt so wrecked while I rested at the TIC area. My lower back sored and I felt like vomiting as I cool down and strecthed.
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Oh yes, it rained finally but that was when I dozed off in the comfort of my bed at home 2 long hours later.
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